End of nightmare

Why did I end up so messed up, so lonely?
Standing outside in the pouring rain
People stare at me with pity, or disgrace
They don’t see my unbearable inner pain
Became something so hideous, so vulgar
No more self respect, or any pride
Allowed a substance to take over and control me
While it eats me up, I die deep down inside
Foreseen future, would I’ve walked another way?
Run away, hide safe and sound
So I could not have developed a taste for it
Never a part of me, never around
Many tried to warn me of my choice
Nightmares awoke me, still I remained blind
Unhappiness surrounded me, misery
Still I must have been out of my mind
Stuck in this hell hole going no where
Trapped inside, fearful, scared, dread
Unable to escape nowhere to run
Wait for the day I’m no longer off my head
Messed up, confused, destroyed, broken, sad
Angry, lonely, worried, frightened, depressed, low
Nervous, pathetic, insane, desperate, distorted
Totally stuck, a bloody mess, whom I no longer know.
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