Wooden Heart

Giuseppe excitement burst

he had been granted the son

he sought for years

embracing this wooden boy

his mind was racing

heartfelt gracious joy

oh child, now onwards

you shall be my new toy

great expectations

overwhelming the boy

prospects and opportunities

were formulate that night

visions of glory

stars shinning bright

creations of grandeur

enthusiasm creeping

such dogmatic style

Giuseppe was weeping

oh son you shall be

what I never succeed to do

all my failed ambitions

I am now hand them to you

all my years of self-loathing

low self-esteem and pure self-hate

these are your birth right

your destiny, your fate

son, my father

he taught me

Victorian sin

any emotions that you feel

you must hold them within

any fear that you sense

you must hide it away

yes son, just like me

you will be a man one day

Wooden heart replied

father, I ask

can I please

have a choice

may I just speak

let me please have my voice

I want to learn to dance

I want to be real

sail the seven seas

see the world

I do not want to be a man

I want to be a girl

I want to wear pink

flowers in my hair

I want to waltz through life

without a single care

his volcano exploded

Giuseppe rage broke

you cannot wear pink

as you are a bloke

no son of mine

will be a f**king Queen

go wash out your mouth

your mutterings are obscene

Wooden heart left the room

he departed with a sigh

if he is going to be my dad

then I would rather die

why would he make me

into a pathetic version of him

he is just a pauper, he is not a King

sat in his bedroom

his wooden heart began to wane

I may only hold a wooden heart

however, I still have a brain

I will leave here tonight

I shall run far away

then I will not have to listen

to what the old man has to say

so he left with a heart as heavy as lead

the tears rolled down his face

deep painful feelings were hurting his head

he walked and he walked

till the night became morn

I hate him, he shouted

I never asked to be born

Giuseppe awoke

alas he was running late

on the realisation his son had gone

he turned into a desperate state

his heart sunk

as a ship out at sea

oh my son, oh my son

where can you be?

why have you gone ?

have you deserted me?

Giuseppe left in a haste

to search for his son

oh good heavens

please tell me

what have I done?

I pushed him away

with my controlling  arrogance

I did not listen to my poor child

I never gave him a chance

just as my father stole away my hope

the same way he never encouraged me

when I felt as if I could no longer cope

I am becoming my father

whilst I swore I would not

oh my precious child

my rage that I bury

is not your fault

this shame that I carry

I have turned it into fury

my hope is to turn back time

the manner in which I spoke to you

was an unorthodox crime

Giuseppe came across the boy

sat in the middle of the road

holding onto a toy

son can you forgive me

whilst you were striving to be authentic

I wanted you to be just like me

father I am frightened

monsters hide under my bed

but they do not match the monsters

you have created inside my head

I want to evolve at my own pace

I want to marriage a person

be that same sex, different race

please allow my imagination to run wild

stop turning me into

a dysfunctional adult

as I am only child

the honour and respect

which you require for me

these ethics and principles

they are mine to give

but they do not come for free

for it is a dual process

the relationship dynamic

between father and son

as your ambition may be wasted

however, my young life

has just begun.

MedusaMoon c2015

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